Serendipity
by Gwynn
Summary: Short pieces written from Helga’s point of view about different aspects and situations of her relationship with Arnold. Contains some sexual references in one poem. Arnold/Helga pairing
1. Courage

**Serendipity **

**Author's Note: Okay, I'm really going out on a limb here. In addition to the one-shot I'm writing, I also got a flash of inspiration the other day and wrote this short poem called "Courage." I have to warn you I'm more of a free-form poet instead of a rhymer. My excuse for such an approach is that I create poems with a good flow, even if they don't exactly rhyme. Furthermore, I'm not making any definite promises yet, but I think I'll add more poems as I write them. All will be written from Helga's point of view about different aspects and situations of her relationship with Arnold. These poems aren't necessarily meant to be a coherent anthology, but are of a more random nature as my inspiration suits the occasion to write a particular poem on a particular theme. Hence the title _Serendipity_. Anyway, here's a run-of-the-mill piece about Helga's pining for Arnold after he's moved on with Lila. I know it's not exactly a happy theme to start off with, but I hope you enjoy it anyway.**

**Courage**

**Whom we love best, to them we can say least.**

**- English proverb**

****

_I die every day without you,_

_I cry every night without you._

_As a plant withers without the support of the sun, _

_So I cannot exist without you._

_When will I have the courage to tell you how I feel?_

_Will I go mad if my desire remains unrequited?_

_You used to be near,_

_But no more are you._

_I pushed you away when I had amble opportunity,_

_Circumstances have changed beyond repair;_

_Besides, there is another,_

_You have made that clear._

_She is as beautiful as you are:_

_Golden and healthy, _

_Radiant as a proud peacock with feathers stretched._

_I wish happiness, it is true; _

_But the madwoman in me mourns the loss,_

_Whatever it was, _

_A sapling hope too soon shorn,_

_A love never to be._

_And so I silently watch, day by day, as you pass me,_

_Yearning for some sign that I am not dead to you._

_Is that my station in life, to observe vicariously?_

_I do not know the answer to this dilemma,_

_But I do know for certain I wish I had more courage._

**Author's Note: Please tell me what you think. Should I add on more poems?**


	2. Fulfill Me

**Serendipity**

**Author's Note: Thanks so much for the response I got for "Courage." I appreciate any and all feedback. Frankly, I'm not as confident of my abilities as a poet as I am a writer. Therefore, _Serendipity_ is pretty much as much of a learning experience as I go along as it is for you readers. Keeping this in mind, I unveil "Fulfill Me," my latest short piece. The premise here is that Helga ponders her ambivalent feelings toward ****Arnold****. No, it's not a particularly light-hearted theme either, but I promise to throw in some fluff poems somewhere should you like these others I crank out. Enjoy and keep on reviewing!**

**Fulfill Me**

**The greatest hate springs from the greatest love.**

- **English proverb**

_This is my solemn declaration:_

_I utterly and completely hate everything about you._

_Most of all I detest those many years that have been wasted,_

_Slavishly devoted to your ubiquitous presence._

_And all the while I only waited for you to somehow notice me,_

_To give me a little bit of your precious time._

_But you always passed me by with barely a second glance;_

_So I tire of being patient,_

_Of waiting for a chance that may never come. _

_Why don't you quit haunting my dreams?_

_There is nothing left of me to offer;_

_You drained away my very essence,_

_With naught but a hollow shell remaining behind._

_Yet as surely as the sun rises in the east,_

_I know one look from you will uplift my spirits again._

_Yes, just as I think I am through with you,_

_Something compels me to return to my silly visions of you and me._

_You inspire yet frustrate;_

_You mercilessly tease and excite;_

_You pitch me into the deepest throes of heartache,_

_Then set my soul ablaze._

_I cannot live with you,_

_Nor can I imagine an existence without you._

_Don't you see how I'm such a fool for you?_

_You've got me wrapped around your fingertips;_

_And you always will have me that way,_

_Though you may be too blind to ever fully realize it._

_So why do you have to let me linger?_

_Why can't you fulfill me?_

_Why do I feel such exquisite torment,_

_And you will not even acknowledge I am alive?_

**Author's Note: Again, please tell me what you think. Should I continue on?**


	3. Small Shreds of Allurement

**Serendipity**

**Author's Note: To take a break from a long-ass weekend of research paper writing, I decided to write this short ditty for you guys. The circumstances I had in mind for this poem is Helga is resorting to some good old-fashioned daydreaming in her ponderings about ****Arnold****. Yep, it's sufficiently fluffy, light, and- dare I say it- corny, so enjoy and please review!**

**Small Shreds of Allurement**

**The very fact that we are looking for something usually stands in the way of our finding it.****   
- African Proverb**

_I don't talk to you very often;_****

_Even then, it's just to toss some customary mocking your way._

_There are precious few moments when I succeed in going beyond that boundary,_

_And you find humor in me,_

_Or are you just humoring me?_

_Sometimes I believe you seek my company and companionship,_

_So I bestow upon you whatever small shreds of allurement I might possess;_

_I often wonder if that's enough for you._

_Each time I am touch you,_

_An electric current runs through me,_

_Like a nuclear fission upon my skin that refuses to subside;_

_I long to feel your lips on mine,_

_To stoke the fire of passion burning within me,_

_For I couldn't even begin to know how to put out the flames._

_Don't you see how much taller and straighter I walk when I am near you,_

_Imagining the desire and interest emblazoned in your eyes as I pass? _

_Why don't you take a chance on a shy blonde? _

_She's been waiting the whole time to be with you,_

_If only you would give her the word._

_It's true she hasn't much to offer in terms of the strictly conventional,_

_Yet she has her own quirks with which to excellently recommend herself._

_How can anyone refuse such a proposal?_

_But you'll never know what she's really like if you don't quit looking and just see…_

**Author's Note: Well, it's back to the homework I go. I have an idea for an even longer and more developed piece than this one, but it'll have to wait until the end of the semester…**


	4. My Friend the Void

**Serendipity**

**Author's Note: For the last couple of weeks, the only real free time I've been allotting myself has been to watch a couple of anime shows I've recently started following. Well, this was written on the aforementioned night between those shows with nothing else better to do for the moment than to listen to some music and let inspiration take its due course. I hope the resulting piece isn't flat-out bad or too much of a reflection of how tired I seem to be lately. There's some of the personification in here that I've wanting to try my hand at, but nothing to the extent of the future "masterpiece" I'm hoping to cook up by this upcoming weekend (I'll finally be done with my spring semester!). As for "Set Me Free" or the one-shot I intend to put out, don't worry: I'll be working on both along with an update for "The Awakening." Just remember that it might take me a while. Rest assured I'll also be reviewing for you guys again as soon as I can put the horrors of finals week behind me. With all this rambling now out of my system, here's a poem about Helga feeling a little "empty" about the "hollowness" of her life. I guess my forte is angsty stuff. Anyway, enjoy and please review!**

**My Friend the Void**

**One friend watches for another.**

**- English proverb**

_I feel a great yawning abyss opening within me,_

_And it is only growing wider by the day,_

_Stretching forth its dark arms toward me._

_How much longer before I fully succumb to its embrace?_

_Would I even care if I did?_

_I must admit this black chasm is an old friend of mine,_

_For we have often met over the years._

_In the wee hours of the morning before the sun has shown her face,_

_Or late at night when the moon's hour is nigh,_

_The void welcomes me._

_We speak of many things in our meetings together,_

_Of matters both past and present;_

_But the conversation inevitably turns to one subject:_

_You._

_A heated debate ensues between my companion and I;_

_He is of the opinion you do not care for me,_

_And I defend you,_

_Declaring you worthy of my attentions._

_This goes on until he abruptly departs,_

_Always extending the same invitation:_

_Join me. _

_Should I forsake you and cleave myself to that vast indifference?_

_It must be comforting not to know anything at all,_

_Nor to feel too much too fast._

_I have a multitude of matters pressing upon my mind,_

_And I don't know how to handle it._

_Oh! There is my friend the void now;_

_He is beckoning me;_

_I must answer his call…_

**Author's Note: Okay, did that suck? Please tell me what you think! Well, I better get back to my finals…**


	5. Estrella

**Serendipity**

**Author's Note: Poetry is one of the few things I believe should be enjoyed in its unadulterated form. Therefore, when I constructed the first four poems, I thought it only appropriate to put them out there without any editing. Hopefully, the moments of when I'm inspired by a particular emotion show through in an accurate way. Now, here's the "masterpiece" I've been working on. I believe it might reveal the more "reflective" side of Helga's nature. It centers on a personification theme I started developing when staring out at the night sky a few weeks ago, and the resulting piece is the one you see before you. Anyway, it's called "Estrella." In case you don't know, that's Spanish for "star." With this said, the object of my personification I'm referring to must be painfully obvious by now. Then what's the theme, you ask? Arnold's left Hillwood City to go live with his parents in San Lorenzo, and Helga's missing him, of course. Enjoy and please review!**

**Estrella**

**Even a small star shines in the darkness.**

- **Finnish proverb**

_The stage is being set for night's grand entrance:_

_Bands of orange and gold march across the sky,_

_While streaks infused with pink and red hues trail behind._

_I watch with wonder as the curtains finally part;_

_A vast black expanse materializes,_

_Slowly being filled up by countless twinkling lights._

_Leading this procession is the moon herself, _

_For she plays the role of presider,_

_As she has always done and will continue to do for all time._

_What really captivates my attention is you._

_It is true you lack the prominence your flashier counterparts have,_

_Nor do you occupy a particularly advantageous spot in the heavens._

_Perhaps your very obscurity is what endears you to me;_

_You serve a vital function for me._

_I imagine a certain boy far away in a distant jungle land,_

_Gazing upon you in the same manner I do._

_In this way we share a connection again,_

_And I am able to bear the severance of our ties all those years ago._

_Little Estrella, can you tell me what he is doing now?_

_What does he look like?_

_Does he still act on his altruistic instincts?_

_Is he truly happy with those whom he has been deprived of for so long?_

_But I would give up any opportunity to know the answers to these burning questions,_

_If only you could grant my greatest desire, little Estrella;_

_Please impart the message I never delivered:_

_Goodbye, Arnold. _

**Author's Note: I dedicate "Estrella" to my four best friends and adopted "siblings": Jeremy, Rachel, Michele, and Sarah. Whatever you're doing now, I wish you all the best life has to offer.**


	6. According to the Giver

**Serendipity **

**Author's Note: After much sifting through the old collection of poems I've already written, I decided to finally use this one. Believe it or not, I did "According to the Giver" when I was a junior in high school (about a completely conjectural situation, of course). I just thought it would be appropriate to use here as well for the thesis I had in mind: What would Helga think about "giving herself" to Arnold?  The reason why I consider this to be one of my personal favorites is because I believe it brings up a few good points in regards to the topic of sex. Unfortunately, that same subject matter we're dealing with has also forced me to jack up the rating on _Serendipity_ for cautionary reasons. Anyway, enjoy and please review!**

**According to the Giver  **

**_And now you're thinking little thoughts about it_**

**_Taking every inch of him in_**

**_What does it mean when something changes how it's always been?_**

**_Liz Phair, "Little Digger"_**

****

_Tonight you desire to fully unwrap a gift,_

_The most beautiful and precious of all gifts.___

_Yet such a feat is not easily accomplished,_

_For it entails great consequences._

_Do you remember how we came to arrive at this moment?_

_It started many years ago,_

_When we were young and without a care in the world.___

_You first saw the gift's outer trappings then;_

_Intrigued, you wanted to find out what lay beneath._

_Layer after layer was peeled away,_

_And you were naturally at the helm of this slow, painful process._

_Who else but you could have been the mastermind?_

_Now there is little left to do, _

_Except for one very important act,_

_One that will either be the consummation or undoing of us.___

_Knowing this, do you wish to proceed,_

_To take away that last bit of protection and innocence we have?_

_Yes, I do want you as you want me;_

_Every night I dream of us together,_

_Of how it would flow perfectly,_

_From each kiss to each touch to each caress that would pass between us._

_Yet this is merely an idealistic rendering;_

_Reality is always lurking a short distance away._

_If you were to receive the gift,_

_Those innermost physical and spiritual sides of my being never known by anyone else before,_

_I would not only want you but need you as well._

_Can you really claim you are ready for such possession?_

_In the end, one truth prevails above the ambivalence:_

_The time for giving is according to the giver,_

_And now is regrettably not my time…_


End file.
